Cool For the Summer
by kittylovesanime
Summary: Severa and Cordelia separately spend the day together with their best friend after not seeing each other for a long time. Both mother and daughter realize that they are in love. As the day goes on, will their feelings be reciprocated? The story is told alternately through Severa's and Cordelia's POVs
1. Meeting the Other Half

"Do you have everything?" my mom asks. We're in her bright blue 2014 Outlander Sport, the car idle in front of my best friend, Kjelle's house.

"Yeah," I say, my tone a little too harsh. I don't mean it. I'm not sure if Mom knows. Judging from how her dark red eyes droop with sadness, she doesn't. Or maybe she does, but it bothers her nevertheless. I don't know why I've stuck with this occasional attitude towards her; I'm not the fourteen-year-old moody girl I used to be.

Not wanting to drag this on for too long, I open the car door and get out. Mom passes me my forest green duffel bag from the backseat. "Thank you." I clutch the bag and my leather purse close to me. Well, I don't think the purse is real leather; Mom bought it from a street vendor.

"Call me if you need anything, okay Severa?"

"Sure." I smile, feeling the tension melt away. "Have fun with Cynthia's mom!" Mom nods, grinning. I close the car door and watch her drive away until she makes a right at the end of the street, the car lights blinking out of view. I let out a breath I didn't realize I was holding, turning to face Kjelle's house. It's basically a mansion, but she won't admit it. Like all the other houses in this area, it's a beautiful brick house with three floors. The lawn is a lush green, freshly cut. To celebrate the summer, the lawn is littered with solar-powered cute animals that brightly illuminate the lawn at night. My favorite is the owl, proudly standing by the mailbox. I pet it as I pass by for the front door. Right before I knock on the red wooden door, my stomach gets a little queasy and my heart starts pounding. _It can't be nerves. I'm probably just hungry. Yet it doesn't quite explain the heart-pounding…_

* * *

I'm pressing the gas pedal a little too hard, I know, but I can't wait! A full day with my best friend, Sumia? My pegasus partner? My other half? I've barely seen her for more than a few hours before one of us is whisked away by our daughters or husbands or other motherly tasks. Things are calm on my end, since Severa's father left when she was only a year old and she's in college now, but Sumia? Her fourteen-year-old daughter, Cynthia, is a burst of sunshine with boundless energy that can sometimes be a lot to handle. And added with the others, Lucina and the twins, Morgan and Morgiana, Sumia is constantly running around to chess matches, fencing practices, and the grocery store. At least she isn't alone. She has Chrom with her. He's such a wonderful father and husband, and I know the family's lucky to be so whole and happy. Sometimes I just wish that for myself…

I slow to a halt once I've reached Starbucks, where Sumia is waiting. She's outside, sunbathing on a bench, wearing a blue and pink sundress with little white clouds everywhere. She has a white beret on her head, probably to hide her messy silver bedhead. I roll down the passenger-side window and shout, "Mia!"

Sumia perks up at her nickname and sees me grinning ear-to-ear and squeals, "Deliaaaa!" She stands up to smooth down her dress and I get out of the car, almost getting stuck in the seat belt and hitting myself on the car door. I rush to her and we hug each other tightly. Sumia's raspberry perfume wafts over, making me smile; she hasn't changed her perfume scent once. When we let go, I hold her face in my hands. "Long time no see, huh?" she asks, her gray eyes glinting.

"Yeah," I say. My heart's pounding hard. _I can't wait._


	2. Starting the Day

Kjelle and I are lounging in her living room, our skin sticking to the leather couches. My long red hair is matted with sweat. Kjelle seems less uncomfortable, since her thin black hair stops above her neck. She's reading the latest _Game Informer_ magazine. I watch her flip the pages carefully; it's like watching paint dry honestly. _It's only been twenty minutes and I'm already dying._ The central air conditioning is on at 83 degrees, which I think is too hot. But Kjelle doesn't mind it, and I'm too lazy to walk over to the thermostat. "Ughh," I groan, "why haven't you gotten silk couches alreadyy?"

Kjelle snorts, her eyes not leaving the magazine. "They're unnecessarily expensive and gaudy." I hmph. "Besides," she continues, "they're not really my style."

"It could be your mom's style."

Kjelle actually laughs this time. "You know that's bullshit." I laugh along. Sully, Kjelle's mom, is super hardcore. She rides motorcycles and plays every sport under the sun, so she thinks that the more you sweat, the better. Being dainty makes her uncomfortable, so I never saw her play along with Kjelle and me when we did our stuffed animal tea time when we were eight. Sully used to be a gymnastic and boxing Olympian, but it's obvious she misses it, so she spends her energy training Kjelle to be like her. I don't think Kjelle is that into it, though. I remember her saying once that she really wants to ice skate, but it doesn't suit Sully's ideal. Kjelle said it in her sleep, though, so I've never mentioned it.

"Kjellee," I whine.

"Whaaat?" she answers, whining back.

"What's on the itinerary?"

Kjelle furrows her eyebrows, her mouth sloping downward in ponder while she continues scanning some article titled… "RPG Grind Time – Why I'm Glad BioWare's Next Game Is A New IP." _What the hell does that even mean?_ "Uh...do you wanna play Just Dance?" she asks.

"I don't wanna sweaat." I flip over onto my stomach, letting out a sigh.

"Are...you hungry?"

"I think I just want to drink something sweet. You know, with ice cubes...ooh, and it has to be taro-flavored with tapioca bubbles, and I need to use a fat straw to drink it."

Kjelle finally puts the magazine down and looks over at me. _Finally, your beautiful brown eyes are on me._ "Severaa," she says knowingly.

"Yes?" I ask innocently.

"You're just describing bubble tea." Hearing the words "bubble tea" from Kjelle's pretty mouth gives me the energy I didn't think it'd give and I start begging for bubble tea. Hell, not just that, I'm talking about swimsuits, bras, Cinnabon, creme brulee iced coffee, Superdry, the fluffy beds in Bed Bath and Beyond, anything and everything until Kjelle acquiesces. She has her mouth turned up into a small smile. "You really want the mall, huh?"

"Pleaseeeee?" I'm on my knees at her feet, cupping her hands in mine.

She rolls her eyes, the smile still there. "Fine."

* * *

"Isn't this so nice?" Sumia murmurs in delight, her eyes closed. We're at a spa, getting the deluxe treatment. Both of us are side-by-side, reclined on comfortable white chairs as two masseuses relieve the tension in our bodies. One is currently massaging Sumia's feet; I'm lying face-down while the other is working on my shoulders. As the masseuse does his magic, I feel lighter, rejuvenated. _All of this from just doing my shoulders?_ Sumia's right—this is really nice.

"And you do this all the time?" I question. Sumia laughs. It sounds light, but muffled. Like bells chiming, but my head is stuck underwater. Probably because I'm very close to dozing off. I shake my head vigorously to keep myself awake.

"Only when Chrom insists that he got this 'cause he planned a Mom-free day trip." Mention of Chrom brings down my mood, and I know the masseuse feels it; he kneads my lower back hard.

I try to keep the sadness out of my voice when I say, "That's so sweet of him!" Ugh, saying it makes me want to spit those words onto the ground. It doesn't feel right, being happy for Sumia like this, when I need it more. Need him more. _Wait, shut up Cordelia. You don't want him. Not anymore._

Sumia giggles, relaxing me again. Her happiness is infectious, so I can't be bitter around her for too long. "You dropped off Severa at Kjelle's house, right?" she asks casually.

"Yeah. I think she really needed it; they haven't seen each other in so long."

"How is Kjelle and her mom, actually?"

I shrug. "I heard Kjelle's busy with horseback riding or something like that. Sully obviously put her up to it." Personally, I don't think Kjelle likes the activities Sully picks out for her at all. Sure, she's good at them—okay, maybe not gymnastics—but I never see her light up talking about them. Sully does, though. Her bright brown eyes dazzle me every time she's talking about Kjelle and her latest sport, while her daughter stands idly nearby, her eyes trained to the floor.

"Mm," Sumia says, clearly into the masseuse's hands gliding over her calves. I lift up my head just enough to watch intently, admiring the smoothness of Sumia's legs. There are faint scars that mark her otherwise perfect ivory skin: the scratch marks on her left ankle that her childhood cat made, the long cut on her inner thigh from her wooden rocking horse when we were nine, and other various scrapes from falling off horses.

I think I've been looking too long, because I notice too late that Sumia is giving me an odd look. It's the same one Severa gives me for being "too pushy." _Crap,_ I think. I turn my head away, face burning.


	3. Misunderstanding Feelings

The mall isn't so crowded today for a Tuesday. It's mainly your middle-aged men with strollers and your "edgy" teens hanging around Hot Topic. Seeing the teens with their crazy-colored hair and too many wristbands crawling up their arms that shouldn't be legal brings me back to my lengthy scene phase. It lasted four years, and Kjelle was with me for the worst of it. She helped me dye my red hair to a desired platinum. It ended up being the color of rust, though. I kept bleaching my hair until the platinum was able to shine through. Kjelle warned me not to do that, 'cause it damages your hair or whatever. She also said that my hair was already too pretty to warrant dyeing. I didn't care, but I regret it now.

I tug on a twintail at the thought of Kjelle's three-year-old compliment, moving my eyes away from the teens. I want her to compliment me more, and she generally gives it freely, but lately she hasn't. "Kjelle?" I ask suddenly, turning my gaze towards her. Kjelle glances over, sipping frozen strawberry lemonade from Auntie Anne's. This is as sweet as she goes, partially because of her diet to go along with her training, partially because she never developed a sweet tooth like I did.

"Yes?" she murmurs in between sips. I like how she sips, long and slow. Like she's trying to savor it, even though her eyes don't give much away. But me? I gulp things down.

"Tell me something." I don't know why really, but my heart's pounding hard as I say that. Harder than it should. As if I went through Kjelle's daily workout routine. _Am I okay? Am I dying? I usually don't feel this way…_

"Ummm…" The nineteen-year-old girl hands me her drink. "Want a sip?"

It's a simple question, but I start freaking out as my mind goes into hyperdrive. _Okay, if I take a sip of her drink, that'll be an indirect kiss, is she cool with that? Wait, we do this all the time. Why is it so different now?_ Then I start thinking about feeling the cherry chapstick residue on the straw, warm from her touch, and I swear I feel like an old man with an ensuing heart attack. "What if I just kiss you?" I blurt, my skin burning everywhere.

Kjelle's taken aback. Her dark brown eyes are looking at me in concern, her lightly tanned face flushed. "I-I'm sorry, excuse me?"

My mind's screaming. _What the fuck was that for?! What are you saying Severa, are you_ trying _to freak her out?! This is the first time you've seen her all year, and you're coming out with that?! Fucking hell!_ I try to backpedal. "Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh, sorry, autocorrect." I regret it immediately. _Autocorrect?! What are you, a walking drunk Tweet?!_

Kjelle's tense shoulders relax a bit as she answers, "Severa...this is a verbal conversation."

"...Right," I say, wanting to cover my face with my hair. Thankfully, Kjelle lets this drop, leaving us walking in silence as she continues slowly sipping her lemonade.

* * *

"Who knew there were hot springs here?" I ask. Sumia and I are soaking in the pristine water in the spa's courtyard. It doesn't feel like we're in a public place; we're the only ones in the hot spring.

Sumia has her head thrown back, a wet towel on her forehead, clearly relaxed and enjoying this. I'm a few feet away from her, enjoying watching her be so carefree. But then I think about Chrom, and I suddenly detest her. _Stop it,_ I chastise myself, _you love her. You love him with her. You're stronger than this._

But I can't stop. Now I just think about all the times I've watched the two of them grow together in high school, leaving me out. It wasn't intentional, I know, but I felt like a kicked puppy. I loved and hated how Chrom horned in between me and Sumia. Loved, because I got to be wrapped up in his cinnamon cologne. But hated, because he was only there for Sumia, not me. Then, they spent more time together without me, so I had to watch from afar the way he shyly intertwined their hands together for the first time, the increased amount of times Sumia tripped over herself, the way their eyes glittered…

I splash my face with the warm water to pull me out of my misery. _You just want Sumia all to yourself. You're so selfish._

 _Wait, I meant Chrom._

 _Wait...what?_


	4. Scents and Confessions

I laugh at Kjelle wrinkling her nose as I drag her into Bath and Body Works. "Severaaa," she complains quietly, but otherwise letting me pull her inside.

"Come on, it's time to figure out your summer scent!" I squeal. Kjelle's low tolerance for sweet things applies to her sense of smell too, but I love taking her here anyway. I don't really have anyone to go wander around with, so I Kjelle is all I got. _Not that I'd rather anyone else._ Her presence calms but excites me at the same time. Since she's lived in a bubble in her grand house and fancy sports, I try to show her the things average people like me enjoy. For example, Bath and Body Works.

"But I was fine with last summer's scent," Kjelle retorts. I haven't mentioned before, but I love hearing Kjelle talk. Her voice is low and smooth, like velvet. If her voice was a cat, I'd never stop petting it. But alas, the best I can do is let her quiet tones ring through my ears.

"Yeah, but we get new scents! And so, more options for you." I grin at her, tugging on her hand. I choose a scent for her every season. She rarely uses perfume or body mist, so I always smell her Dove eucalyptus soap. It suits her, but I want her to find her signature scent that isn't soap. It's kinda selfish of me, yeah, but look, when you're around her as often as I am, you'd start wanting to experiment too. Besides, she only does this for me, so let me indulge a little. I lead her to the shiny new display of scents. "Ohmygod!" I yell, scaring the store greeter.

"What?" Kjelle asks.

I point to the display. "They brought back retired scents!" Kjelle gives me a blank look, her pink mouth in a small frown. "They used to be in circulation back when we were in middle school, but they've been off the shelves for years, remember? I can't believe they brought back Pink Chiffon, it was my fave!" I pick up a bottle of body wash, screw off the cap, and take in a deep whiff. I pass it to Kjelle, where she sniffs it.

"I remember this," she says, her eyes brightening. "I always had the sensation of eating cotton candy when you wore this." I bite my lip to keep from saying, _I wanted you to eat me._

I put the bottle back down as another scent catches my eye. "Ooh, Cucumber Melon? Dude this is totally you." I shove a bottle of body mist at Kjelle.

Kjelle gingerly takes it, asking, "Really? I've never tried this before…" At my urging, she sprays her wrist with it and sniffs. I expect her to say some sort of agreement, but she just looks at me with blank eyes again.

"What's up? Is the spray not working?"

"No, I...I can't smell anything." I stare at her for a long while, taking in her outfit of a purple tank top and beige cargo shorts. It's a bit of a fashion disaster, but she pulls it off perfectly. _It shows off her curves. Ugh,_ _focus on what Kjelle's saying, Severa. You can admire her all you want later._ After shaking my head to clear those thoughts, I burst out into laughter. Kjelle giggles along. This happens sometimes: Kjelle's fine for a few minutes, but then the clashing of strong scents gets to her and Kjelle can't tell anything apart. Today is one of those days.

"That's fine, we can just ring this up," I say, taking a bottle of Pink Chiffon body wash and French Lavender Honey lotion. I reach for Kjelle's soft hand, pulling her to the register.

* * *

After forty minutes of sitting in the hot spring with Sumia, I'm burning up. And not just from the steam—all of Sumia's movements is making me flush in a way I've never experienced before.

Well, I mean, I experienced it...but only with Chrom, and the man who I thought loved me but left me to care for Severa on my own.

Sumia's supple skin, flushed from being in the hot spring, seeing her happy, it kills me.

And it makes me want to kiss her.

 _No, stop. Don't throw away your friendship for this. You don't even know what's going on._

 _Chrom has her. What do I have?_

 _Am I just jealous?_

"Cordelia?" Sumia calls out from across the spring. I've moved farther away from her and stuck my head up to my nose in the water, trying to hide everything.

I sputter some water out to answer, "Yeah?"

"Why are you so far?" She starts treading towards me. I start backing up, sputtering nonsense. But Sumia's gray eyes give me a knowing look. She knows I'm lying. _Of course she knows. She's been in my life ever since we were three. What_ doesn't _she know?_

 _She doesn't know I love Chrom. I guess I should say loved, though. I moved on._

 _Right?_

"Cordeliaaaaa, you can't hide from me." Sumia made it to me, leaving me pressed against the stone wall at the edge of the spring. She presses a damp hand to my cheek. I just want to melt under her touch. Whenever Sumia touches me, I feel so...safe. Like she's always holding me up. I feel all the love radiating from her hand.

I kiss her hand in a moment of weakness. I can't deny her. I can't deny myself from her.

So I blurt, "I loved Chrom."


	5. Denial

"Severa, why do you keep doing that?" Kjelle asks for the umpteenth time. We're wandering the mall again, holding our valued Bath and Body Works scents in the cute blue and white bags. You could say I'm walking way too close to Kjelle, but I requested that she wear the Cucumber Melon for me, and I just wanna bask in the new scent flowing from Kjelle's neck.

That's not the reason Kjelle is asking me that, though. It's because I'm giving her these come-hither eyes. _Wait, that's not the right word...what do I really mean?_ I blush at Kjelle's words and shake my head in hopes of clearing that look from my red eyes. "You just smell _so_ good," I reply. It doesn't answer her question at all, but I don't know what else to say. Whatever is going on, I'm not going to stop it, my wildly beating heart be damned. "Perfect summer scent."

Kjelle's cheeks flush at my compliment and she moves to grab my hand, but the words, "Hey, Kjelle," stop her. We both look up at the source of those words, me ready to insult the person who dares to interrupt us and our day together, but Kjelle sputters nonsense when we see that it's Laurent, her admirer.

" _Laurent?!_ " I screech. I want to scream. He occasionally hung around Kjelle and me in high school in hopes that she'd look at him as more than a study partner. I hated him for that. Hated him even more when I found out that he got into Boston University with Kjelle too. I also hated the fact that he has the same tell-tale red hair as me and my mom. No, we're not related. _God, I'd die if we were._

I keep using the word hate in the past tense. Scratch that, I still hate him. Sometimes when Kjelle and I are talking on the phone over the school year, her in her luxurious dorm room while my roommate sexiled me so I had to talk in the stairwell, she told me how they've grown closer together. I clenched my phone and gritted my teeth as she regaled me with his "adorable" attempts to win her over with flowers and dumb bath bombs. I always kept the bitterness out of my voice though. I mean, I practically asked for it—I refused to talk about myself in any significant manner and pressed Kjelle about her life instead. How could I talk about myself? I was spending our first year apart struggling with classes and homesickness. I didn't have too many friends, except for this boy named Inigo, who tried to charm me but failed. It wasn't his charms that got to me anyway—it was his profound honesty and affection. We found solace in each other, mostly because we were both dealing with pains that ran deeper than we wanted to think. He was still grieving over his mother's death, and I couldn't deal with the distance I've made with mine.

But my mom wasn't the focal point of my homesickness.

It was Kjelle.

Obviously, I didn't want her to know just how much I was missing her, so I let her talk about dumb-as-shit Laurent and her blossoming social life while I was left with mascara-streaked tears running down my face. I was glad when things with Laurent didn't pan out.

 _Yet here we are, watching the way his eyes glitter for her. Will hers ever glitter for me?_

* * *

"W...what?" Sumia's gray eyes look at me in confusion, her face cast in shadow. Her hand has left my cheek. I hate myself immediately. _I need her radiance back. How could I do this to her?_

I wring my hands together, my fingers prunes. _Shouldn't we get out of this hot spring? The effects have long expired._ I stutter, trying to find a way to tell her gently. But there's no way. Instead, I just reach for her hand, knowing that I don't deserve to feel her hand in mine. She pulls it away. I sigh. "I just…" I begin.

"Why…?" Sumia is slowly receding into herself. She gets like that sometimes, mostly when we were on the equestrian team and Sumia was having a hard time getting the hang of things. Seeing a fifteen-year-old girl crumble then broke my heart.

But I'm breaking hers now. "Why did you love him?" Sumia finishes, surprising me.

I furrow my eyebrows. "For the exact same reason you do. He's kind, compassionate, funny, supportive…" I trail off, scared to continue. I fold my arms, trying to keep myself from falling apart.

"But Cordelia...you didn't say anything."

"Sumia, how could I? He loved you, and I...well, loved your happiness more than mine."

Tears spring in her eyes as Sumia cups my face. "I would've backed off."

I hang my head, my hair making a red iron curtain between us. "I know," I mumble, "I didn't want you to."

"But," my best friend protests, "you knew him longer." _Not that much longer._ Chrom and I met when I did that science camp the summer before seventh grade. I was the youngest there, because I was branded a "genius," and Chrom was doing research with his mom in the History department. I was crying in the university courtyard when Chrom found me and offered to play a game of Dominoes with me. Since then, I'd clung to him.

I realized quickly during our time together that he was way out of my league. Even for a thirteen-year-old, he was hounded by the pretty fifteen-year-old girls in the science camp. His numerous dates that summer often meant leaving me alone at night, wondering where he was.

Don't get me wrong, Chrom isn't that kind of person to leave someone hanging. It just felt that way, because whenever I asked him to hang out, he'd already be taken, off to get ice cream or whatever rich girls offered him.

It was during one of those times that I realized that he'd never look at me. It was impossible for the summer crown boy of the University of Chicago to look at me like that. So, I stuck with what I knew: protecting him from the girls who didn't really love him either, and keeping my feelings buried. Chrom was—and is still—too sweet for his own good, and let himself be swept away. I needed to keep him grounded. It was my only use.

I tried comforting myself that summer by thinking that this was only temporary, that I'd never see him again anyway. It didn't work. I only fell deeper, so I was relieved when camp ended and I came back home to Newark, New Jersey.

I thought I was free, but just when the pain in my heart had come to a dull ache, I found him in my Geometry class freshman year. I played the cat-and-mouse game with him, until halfway through we found out we had the same lunch period. He hung out with his crew of Frederick, Stahl, and Vaike, whereas I sat alone because Sumia had her lunch later than mine, and I didn't want to sit with anyone else. Chrom invited me to sit with them, to rekindle our friendship.

All it did was rekindle my love and fierce protection of him.

"Cordelia," Sumia says softly, bringing me out of my reverie. Only then do I notice the tears on my cheeks. "I'm so sorry." Hearing the sadness in her voice, sadness for _me_ , unleashes the years of my pent-up self-infliction. I break down in sobs and fall into Sumia's arms.


	6. Frustration and Tempation

Kjelle, Laurent, and I are sitting in the food court, me sitting across from them. The fake lovebirds are sharing chicken nuggets, but I refuse to eat. It's dumb, I know. My stomach's growling, but I can't eat with fucking Laurent here. _That's supposed to be me sharing chicken nuggets with Kjelle._ I shove another mint in my mouth to quell my stomach's whines.

Laurent is currently trying to keep up-to-date with Kjelle with their reading race. I keep interrupting to talk about feminine stuff like bras and tampons, much to his horror and Kjelle's amusement. It's a tense thirty-minute conversation, but I can't fucking break him, even when I start going on and on about cutting myself shaving. _I thought this dude hated blood? I guess he's that thirsty..._

The red-haired boy graciously leaves us alone after the nuggets are gone so he can use the bathroom, and I feel like I can breathe normally once again. Kjelle lands her eyes on me after he's gone from sight, a playful smile on her lips. "That was mean," she chides. "He just wanted to chat."

I wave that away. "Yeah, whatever. Let's leave him."

Kjelle frowns. "We can't just _do_ that, Severa."

"Yeah we can; who's stopping us?"

She sighs. "Just put up with him for a little longer? Please?"

I give Kjelle a snide look. "Ew, what, like you like him?"

Kjelle's face reddens. "W-what? No...he's just nice, that's all."

I purse my lips. "Fiiine…" I cross my arms once Laurent comes back. Kjelle mouths a reassurance that she won't let me starve as he begins to apologize.

* * *

When Sumia and I get out of the hot spring, I've gone numb. I don't know how much time has passed crying in Sumia's arms, my face buried in her chest—yes, I did secretly revel in that—but we needed to leave.

So I let my best friend drag me out of the water, holding my elbow gingerly. I'd take a moment to be shy or enjoy about being naked with her, now that my feelings have become...something more, but my nose is stuffed and I feel like a raisin. I let Sumia wrap me up in a fluffy cotton white robe as I stood there like a mannequin. I didn't feel like moving. _God, I'm such a child._ Sumia didn't say anything, just rubbed my shoulders until I felt some semblance of warmth, until I didn't feel so numb anymore.

I watched her pull a green robe of equal fluffiness over her shoulders, unaware that she was also looking at me, until Sumia says, "Cordelia?"

"Mm?" I look up to meet Sumia's gray eyes. They're usually bright, though this time there's a new kind of fire in her eyes. Or maybe it's not fire. Maybe it was always there and I just never saw it because I wasn't looking close enough.

Sumia stands close to me, closer than I realized. Her body heat is emanating towards me and I just want to drown in her. It's not until she's right in front of me that she puts her warm hands—how are they so soft?—on my face. "Su…?" The question bubbling up in my throat fades as Sumia leans in and kisses me.

It's incredible. It's the sweetest, warmest, most heart-stopping kiss I've ever had. Sumia kisses me slowly, like she's afraid of feeling me disappear.

My knees buckle and I almost fall to the floor. Sumia catches me by wrapping an arm around my waist and pulling me closer. By then I'm drowning, just how I wanted. I'm grasping at her silver hair, craving more. Her tongue tastes like plums. I don't even know how; we haven't eaten any fruit since we got here.

We collapse against the wall and I'm fumbling for the opening for Sumia's robe. Sumia's hands guide me to her robe, but to my bitter surprise, I pull away. Slowly, but I pull away. It's a small satisfaction seeing Sumia's face fall, her moist lips craving more. We're breathing hard, faces equally flushed. "Why'd you stop?" Sumia asks quietly, leaning close to me.

My head fogs over when Sumia speaks like that. I have to shake my head and push her away a little more before my head clears up enough for me to say, "Why...are you kissing me? I just...told you probably the worst thing…"

Sumia pouts in confusion. She twirls a strand of my hair around her finger. "I don't know why. I just...wanted to. I-I thought that, uh, it'd help."

I squint my eyes at her. "Wait...you mean like a pity kiss?"

Sumia's eyes widen as she takes my hand. "N-no, not at all! I just mean...I don't know actually. I wanted to kiss you. Maybe I always have…"

Hearing her say that makes me smile. "That makes me happy." I frown. "But still…"

Sumia shuts me up by kissing me for a hot moment. When she pulls away to my dismay, she asks, "It's in the past, right?"

That sends my mind into a thousand trains of thoughts. _Is it? I don't really think about Chrom anymore. I just get...hot flashes of envy that quickly fade and leave me tired more than angry. I care about Sumia. Would I say I love her? I mean I do, but...wait, who am I to horn in their beautiful marriage? Their relationship has lasted literal decades. Well, so has Sumia and me...do I get preference?_

 _God, shut up. I can't do this. No. It's time to back off._ But then Sumia kisses me again and I lose all sense of my resolve.


	7. Giving In and Anger

The second I usher my Kjelle into Victoria's Secret, Laurent trailing nervously behind, a bubbly young woman with pink hair approaches us, asking, "Welcome to Victoria's Secret! Is there anything I can help you with today?"

Laurent freezes in his tracks as Kjelle answers, "We're just looking around, thank you." She then pulls on my arm and takes me away from the lady, whose face goes from a wide grin to a smaller smile, tinged with confusion.

Kjelle pulls me to the back of the spacious store, where I finally ask in hushed tones, "What was that for?"

Kjelle crosses her arms and looks at the myriad of multi-colored bras. She focuses on a mannequin wearing a red and pink polka dot bra and panty set. "I didn't want her to hover." Laurent hovers, his reddish-brown eyes wide at everything in the store. _This is probably a wet dream come true._

"...She wasn't though."

Kjelle shakes her head, her short black hair partially covering her face. "I don't know. What's going on with me…?" I open my mouth to say something, but Kjelle cuts me off with, "Let's try that on." She points at the mannequin she was staring at.

I shrug. "Sure." We rummage around for the right sizes with surprising success. Kjelle has bigger boobs than me, so it's hard to find bras in her size with cute designs. We then wander the store, Kjelle passing a hand over soft nightgowns, me blindly taking more bras and shifts. With our things in tow, we head over to the fitting room. Laurent follows us, asking about how measurements work. Kjelle kindly tells him and he blushes as he absorbs the knowledge. He waits outside while we walk into the fitting room. "He's like our bodyguard," I murmur. I've noticed the curious stares the other shoppers have given him, but they probably think he's dating one of us. _Ugh, what if they thought he was my little brother that I had to drag around?_

We're greeted by a somber woman with cotton candy blue hair. She looks like she's trying to blend into the dark pink walls. She gives us a once-over, making me feel cold. I mean, the mall is already cold, but when she looked at me with such a blank, blasé stare, it was like I was being gouged out by an ice-cold hand. I rub my arms, albeit not too well, with all the clothes I'm juggling. She silently takes account of what we're holding and quietly says, "We currently have one room available right now. Would you like to wait for two adjacent ones, or would one of you like to go in first?" Her voice is low and clipped, like she was taking our coffee order.

Kjelle pipes up with her velvet tones to answer, "I think we can share one. Is that okay?"

The woman purses her lips, but nods. "Sure. The room is big enough for both of you. Follow me." She leads us to a room labeled, "Eiffel Tower." Kjelle and I walk inside the large fitting room with full-length mirrors on all three walls. Various hooks and two benches are scattered around the room, reminding me of Kjelle's backyard porch. I don't know why. It just feels right. I like her porch, 'cause there's a swinging bench and I love the feel of the sun on my face, smelling Kjelle's unique scent, drinking English Breakfast tea. This room makes me feel like I can recreate all of that here.

We put the merchandise on one bench, as well as my purse. Kjelle unceremoniously takes off her tank top. My heart beats faster, just like before. I stammer some nonsense and turn away. _Okay Severa. Don't be weird. You've done this before. Why are you weird? It's just Kjelle. And okay, yeah maybe seeing more of her tan skin is making you thinking about more...scandalous things._ That last thought then makes me think about the countless times I've seen Kjelle in stages of nakedness, like when she just gets out of the shower in a way-too-small towel, or when it's actually too hot for Kjelle and she walks around wearing nothing but underwear. They're seemingly nondescript, but it says ridiculous stuff on her butt, like "Fun in the Sun," or "Cool for the Summer," or even "Stay Alive." _Dammit. Now I'm just thinking about her firm butt._ I smack my cheeks with both hands. "What are you doing?" Kjelle questions, concern in her voice. I've realized that I'm just smacking myself in the farthest corner of the room.

I turn around to face her, my skin red. And not just from trying to wake myself up. "Uhhh, nothing!" It sounds incredibly fake, and my best friend almost buys it.

Her mouth is in a thin line when she says, "O...kay. Well, take off your clothes and let's get this over with." I know Kjelle is saying this like we're just comparing what color rug to buy for our future apartment, but I can't get my head out of the gutter. So I take off my flower-patterned blue halter top. I can't even look at her as we both change into the red-and-pink bras. "So?" Kjelle asks from behind.

I shyly turn to face her, my shoulders hunched over, arms crossed. "Ta-da…?"

Kjelle frowns. "Why are you acting so weird, Severa? Here, let me help." She steps in close, her arms reaching out for my hands covering my shoulders. I resist the urge to lean away and focus on the little black hairs on Kjelle's tan arms. _I wonder how it'd feel if I just fell into them…?_ Not realizing how bad I've wanted that, I slowly slump into Kjelle's arms. Kjelle at this point already took one of my hands away, so my other arm is stuck between us as I smush my face into her neck. My best friend holds me up by the waist with her strong arms. I let out a deep sigh. "S-Se...vera?" she inquires quietly.

I inhale her Cucumber Melon scent, almost snuggling into her. "Please don't let go. You're so warm…"

"But...the bras…" Kjelle half protests, her mouth a breath away from my ear. It sends shivers down my spine, relishing in all of her.

Like a dumbass, I give a small, hesitant kiss on her neck. Kjelle takes in a sharp breath, but otherwise doesn't do anything. Feeling a little bolder, I bite her neck with more purpose. Kjelle flinches a little, but stays still. "I'm marking you," I whisper, pulling away just enough to meet her eyes for a brief moment. Her face is a bright red, but her composure doesn't change.

Kjelle's eyes cloud over. I think she's about to pull away entirely and walk out of the dressing room, but then she leans in to bite _my_ neck, murmuring, "Okay. I'm marking you too. Now no one can pull us apart."

"Good," I reply, my skin on fire. _That's all I can say? Really?_ I'm about to say something else, but Kjelle steps away from our embrace, clearing her throat. I see the beginnings of a hickey blooming on her smooth neck. My heart leaps in joy, loving that I'm the one who did that, and not some fuckboy like Laurent. Okay fine, he's not a fuckboy. But I'm still glad he'll never be able to do that.

Kjelle looks away from me, mumbling something about how good I look in the bra. I mumble something similar in return. We silently change out of the garment and move on to the next items we brought, refusing to meet the other's eye.

* * *

Sumia's pulling on my arm as we walk to Carvel, holding hands. Well, I'm walking and she's skipping, which is why she's tugging on my arm. I want to skip, but I feel like it's a Sumia-only action. If I skipped, I won't look like I'm enjoying life. _I only seem to enjoy life with Sumia._ "Come on Delia!" Sumia squeals.

I snort, half-heartedly trying to rein her in. I can't bring myself to seriously do it. "The store isn't running away," I chide. I pick up my pace nevertheless. Still not skipping though.

We make it to Carvel, where we're greeted by: a teen couple bickering about the girl liking some other guy's Instagram picture; a group of four kids and two moms, all wearing a magenta sweatshirt with the words "Valm Preparatory School Chess Team," sitting around two tables, eating their ice creams and talking about their match in quiet tones; and two employees lounging behind the counter. All is silent, making the couple's bickering sound a lot louder than it really is. Sumia leads me to the counter, where she finally gives me the reins to order. We always order the same thing at any ice cream place: Coffee, and Butter Pecan. This time, though, Sumia mutters in my ear, "Surprise us this time, okay?"

I blush, my heart swelling. Sumia clings to my arm as I stroll up to the first employee, who's a tall young man with orange hair and a chiseled face. My heart would've fluttered, but I already have Sumia pressed close to me. The man's light brown eyes glisten with mischief as he eyes us before greeting, "Welcome to Carvel. How may I help you today?" His voice is deep and lively, perfect for a jazz band. I confidently order a Chocolate Praline Pecan Carvelanche. The man gives us a sweet smile as he happily takes the order. He glides around behind the counter, scooping three scoops of the ice cream, ice, and some milk, mixing them together in a blender. Sumia watches in delight as I rummage around for my pink wallet.

"That's a fun choice," Sumia stage-whispers, making the Carvel employee chuckle while he blends. When he's done, he pours the thick, creamy mixture into a medium-sized cup. He hands it to us and rings us up for $7.67. I hand him a ten-dollar bill and he gives me my change with a bright smile. _He could be in a dental advertisement._ I smile back and walk away with the Carvelanche in hand, Sumia grabbing two spoons. We settle into an empty table in the back, farthest from the door. The couple's still arguing, but they've moved on to the value of _Avatar._ The fourth one came out two years ago, but they seem quite heated about it, as if it was opening weekend. Sumia takes the chair opposite me, but the way she impatiently taps on the table makes it obvious that she'd rather be snuggling up to me. To be honest, I'd want nothing more, but I'm still unsure on where we are. I mean, she can't just be so...flippant about my confession. But I can't even begin to tell you how much I've craved this sort of intimacy…

"What do you imagine that guy thinks of us?" Sumia questions conspiratorially, nodding at the employee who's assisted us. He's on his phone now, but he periodically looks up to make sure all the customers are satisfied. His co-worker is napping on another chair, snoring quietly.

I shrug, taking a bite out of the Carvelanche. The chocolatey, nutty treat goes down my throat smoothly. _Hm. Cool for the summer._ "That I'm a homewrecker."

Sumia's eyes widen and she chastises, "No! You're not. Why do you say that?" I give a pointed look at her left ring finger, her diamond wedding ring a blatant reminder of what I'll never have. My best friend scoffs, saying, "This," she takes off the ring, to my horror, "doesn't matter. At least," she averts her gray eyes, "not right now."

I sigh, barely restraining the urge to roll my eyes. "Mia, just because I…" I glance around the shop, making sure no one's eyes are on us, "love you, doesn't mean that your feelings for Chrom are invalid."

Sumia pouts. "Yeah, but...I feel like I've always loved you. Like that. So why...should I stop myself?" She fidgets with the sparkly gem.

I glare at her, offended that she's so willing to give up—even if she never actually goes through with it—the one thing I've always wanted. I've only ever wanted Chrom to look at me, to _love_ me, and Sumia took his affection so effortlessly. I'm craving a stable family with three kids and not have any of them hate me for driving away their father like Severa does. I want to be _seen_ as more, and my damn best friend is carelessly throwing it all away.

I slam my hand on the silver table and yell, "You're just so stupid! You have it all, and you don't even think about anyone else but yourself!"

Sumia gasps and everyone in the shop freezes and stares at me.


	8. Awkwardness and Tears

After...that whole thing in Victoria's Secret, Kjelle suggested we get dinner at Andros Diner. I jumped at it, because I've been _craving_ actual food for the last two hours. _Stupid Laurent for eating my chicken nuggets._ It's not like he's left either—he's loosened up and bought some stuff with us. Not at Victoria's Secret though, thankfully. But at Hallmark, where he bought some Star Wars Itty Bittys. Kjelle looked at him too as she made her suggestion, implying that he doesn't have to come, but it'd be nice if he did. I rather he didn't, but you can't have it all. _Not like I have anything to begin with._ Surprisingly though, Laurent said no, he has to meet up with some of his college friends for dinner at Dave and Buster's. I smile secretly. _Now I can get Kjelle allll to myself, just like I was supposed to._

So now we're in Kjelle's car. It's a silver Volvo, the fancy one that you only need to push a button to start the car. Every time Kjelle starts it, I look at it in awe. _It's like magic._ She's driving through the streets at the legal speed limit. She's such a stickler for rules. When everyone's driving 90, she's driving the 65. I always tell her if she's not keeping up with traffic, she's gonna get a ticket, and she's always like, "Why? I'm not driving like a maniac."

Regardless, I like how Kjelle drives. Swift and smooth. The Volvo responds so well to her, like it molds to her intention. I see it as just more magic.

Do I have a car? Pfft. No. I should honestly. It's fucking New Jersey. But no, I still rely on my mom and the NJ Transit for my transportation needs. Besides, I have Kjelle and her cool-ass Volvo with me. If I had the money, I think I'd get a Volvo like this too. The seats are soo comfortable, I could take a nap right now. "Fucking in the backseat would be a dream," I mumble, staring out the passenger-side window.

"What did you just say?" Kjelle asks, a hint of alarm in her voice.

"Hm?" I question back, even though my face is on fire already. _Shit did I really just say that?_

"Doing what in the backseat would be a dream?" She quickly glances at me.

"Uummm I-I said sleeping! Yeah." _You're such an embarrassment Severa!_

Kjelle purses her lips, but takes my revised statement anyway. "Okay, if you say so...but yeah right, these seats are so nice." She wiggles in her seat, making me think about her butt again. I bite my lip in lust before fixing my face back into a cool stare at the road ahead.

* * *

Sumia's face falls. "Cor…"

I want to yell again, but now that I have everyone's attention on me, the fire within me sputters out. I lost my appetite for ice cream, though. I get up and make for the door as calm as I can, even though I want to run out of here with tears in my eyes. _Don't show weakness to these strangers._ I pull the door open and walk to my car, but Sumia rushes after me, yelling my name. I don't listen to her, I just unlock my car with the remote control and keep walking.

Eventually, Sumia catches up to me and grabs my wrist. I stop and look back at her. She has the carvelanche in her other hand, and she's put her ring back on. I sneer at her. "Once all's said and done, you're not gonna let go of that ring." I pull away from her grasp, but Sumia grabs it again. " _What_?"

Sumia's gray eyes are darker in color. She looks...lost. "I don't want us to fight, Cordelia…"

 _I don't want to either._ But I don't say it. Instead, I say, "Then you shouldn't have gotten my hopes up." I pull away again, and this time she doesn't do anything. I pull open the driver's side car door and get in, jabbing the key into the ignition. The car roars to life. I look up, only to be faced with Sumia's tear-streaked face looking at me from the driver's window, her shoulders hunched. I sigh and roll down the window an inch. "Sumia. Get out of the way." She shakes her head. "Sumia," I repeat, my tone stern. She shakes her head again. The carvelanche is melting in her grip. A rivulet drips down to her fingers, but she pays no mind. She looks at me square in the eyes. I groan.

"I'm not letting you leave like this," she finally says.

"Yeah well, I don't want to see you right now."

She puts her free hand on her hip. Her nose is pink. "You're not running away this time."

I roll my eyes. There's a car parked behind me, so I can't back up. And there's a car parked in front, so I can't just go. "Dammit Sumia," I mutter.

"Talk to me, Delia."

"How? How?! You _know_ how I felt about Chrom, how jealous I am of you! How dare you think that you can throw everything away for _me,_ a pathetic excuse of a mother?!"

She furrows her eyebrows and shifts her weight. "You're not a pathetic excuse of a mother…"

" _Yes_ I am! Severa's dad left and she pretty much hates me! But _you_ , you...always had it all." My shoulders drop. _I'm so tired._

Sumia opens the car door. In my anger, I forgot to lock it. She envelops me in her arms, my head resting on her chest. She smooths down my hair. I start crying quietly, the tears dampening her dress. "Let it out, Cordelia."


	9. Thinking and Action

Andros Diner. The one of few places around that is open twenty-four hours. Where Kjelle and I went after senior prom for a quick bite before heading to Nah's pool after-party. Where I munched down on onion rings while crying about my dad again. Where Kjelle and I studied late nights because I didn't want to go home yet.

Yeah. This place has seen a lot of shit from me. And Kjelle was always there. _I'd die for her, honestly._ We've asked for a booth and I'm relishing in the comfort of their air conditioning, even though we were at the mall all day. I slide into the booth and drop my purse and the various swag bags from the mall next to me. To my surprise, Kjelle picks up the bags, puts everything in the booth across from us, and slides into the booth with me. I purse my lips. She usually sits across from me. I-I mean, not that I'm complaining. It's just not what I'm used to. "Wh-what's this?" I ask.

Kjelle looks at me, her brown eyes unreadable. She puts a hand on my thigh and squeezes, like she's my girlfriend or something. "Just wanted to do something different. This place always sees the same old same old from us, don't you think?"

That sets my cheeks aflame. "W-well, yeah, but, um...isn't this what couples do?"

"Really? Huh. Never thought about it." But her hand doesn't leave my thigh. I'm too scared to mention it. _I might never get affection like this again._ We look through the menu together, pointing out the pros and cons of every item we've ever had. I'm a big fan of their fried calamari. But I can't really focus because Kjelle is too close to me, the Cucumber Melon still on her skin. I don't want to over-think this, but…

* * *

The myriad of cherry trees are in full bloom this season in Branch Brook Park. Not that I'm looking. My gaze is casted down to the ground, dragging my feet like I'm fourteen. Sumia is hovering near me. I won't let her touch me again, but I don't quite want her to leave. So we're trying to casually stroll through the park until I calm down and talk to her again. I can't tell if it's working, since I want to kiss her and shake her all at the same time. She tried to console me back in the car by telling me that I have a lot to be proud of, but it fell flat on my ears.

"Are you mad at me still?" Sumia questions from a ways from me.

I shake my head. Truly. Like I said before, I can't stay mad at her for too long. But I'm tired. Tired of feeling weird about her, about Chrom, about Severa. I'm always pulled five different ways, and I'm tired of constantly feeling bad about it. Why can't I just enjoy whatever I'm given? _Maybe because you're always given the short end of the stick._

 _This is bullshit. I get myself into those miserable situations._

 _So you admit that you're pathetic._

 _No! Fuck, I'm not gonna let myself get the better of me!_ I shake my head vigorously. "I want to be free," I declare, stopping in my tracks.

Sumia's face is torn between hope and confusion. Her eyes are wide, but the corners of her mouth are turned down. The other park-goers around us slow down too, unsure of whom I'm saying it to. I turn to face Sumia. "Mia, you're my best friend."

Sumia gulps. "You're mine too…"

"So fuck it right?"

Sumia looks away, towards the people who've completely stopped their strolls just to stare at us. When she looks back at me, she says, "I don't…?"

I stride over to her, grab her hand, and run.


	10. Proclamations

Kjelle and I are in her pool, splashing water around us. It's a really nice pool, which has a jacuzzi and everything. The only light illuminating our faces are the pool lights around the edges. It's 7:44 p.m. The pool is big too and takes up half of the backyard. Kjelle keeps to herself a lot, so the pool doesn't get much use other than me coming over all the time and the few small pool parties she's hosted. I remember hearing her mom encouraging Kjelle to make more friends, but Kjelle always shrugged and patted my arm, as if saying just having me was enough.

I mean of course she has other friends, like Laurent, Brady, Gerome, and Lucina. But to her, everyone has a specific role. Gerome is her athletic rival and Lucina is her idol, and so she talks to them about sports and general bodybuilding advice. Ugh, back in high school they used to _voluntarily_ go to the gym together. I bet they still do, now that summer's here. Brady is the guy she likes to pick on 'cause he makes it so easy, but he's just as stubborn as I am, so he matches her energy. She usually hangs out with him when I'm busy doing ballet. I should say when I used to do ballet. Not anymore. It stopped being fun, and I felt that Mom was being too...harsh on me. And Laurent is...Laurent. Observant, monotone, pensive. _No brainer why they're friends._

Kjelle's wearing a one-piece with blue, pink, and white vertical stripes. Her tan skin really pops out against these colors. I'm low-key high-key trying to impress her with a teal lace bikini. Though I'm not sure why I bother sometimes; it's not like Kjelle notices these kinds of things. There's three feet of space between us. Things got...weird at the diner. Like Kjelle eventually moved her hand away from my thigh, but then she put it around my shoulders instead. Her face was literally an inch away from mine. She glanced at my neck, where she bit me earlier. Embarrassingly enough, Laurent didn't comment on our hickies, even though he kept looking at them like deer in headlights.

Anyway, the dark-haired teen blew on the hickey, making the hairs stand up. _I swear she's trying to end me._ She also said, "I want to bite you again," in a husky voice and hoo boy, my ovaries were not fucking ready. So I giggled and said something along the lines of we're in public, and she promptly stopped. Let go of my shoulders and sat at a more platonic distance from me and continued the conversation as if we were talking about my favorite tea sets. I didn't wanna make a fuss, since I did technically push her away, but still. I liked that intensity she was giving, even though she never did that before and I was panicking.

So yeah. We're three feet apart in a pool, splashing and looking at the stars. I love living here in Newark 'cause the stars are so much brighter than in NYC. I remember once when I was on our many day trips to Manhattan that I looked up at the sky at around 8 p.m, and...nothing. I saw like two stars. _Made me realize how good I have it here._

"Penny for your thoughts?" Kjelle inquires.

I let out a deep breath. "Just thinking about how pretty the stars are tonight."

"Mmm, they are." I look at her, but she's looking at me, not the sky. She has a small smile on her face, eyes soft.

 _I don't know what to do._ "Um…" I clear my throat, "so Laurent huh. He's nice."

Kjelle snorts. "You hate him."

I nod. "Yeah, not gonna lie. But he's good for you, I guess."

She tilts her head. "What does that mean?"

I raise my eyebrows, trying to find a good way to get out of this. "You know…having a friend at college with you. Getting closer, seeing new sides of each other…"

Kjelle laughs and rolls her eyes. "I don't like him, Severa. And he's barely changed this year." She pauses a moment to think. "Well, he did take up archery with me. But he's just a dependable friend. I'd rather have you with me, though."

I blush, biting my lip. "Thanks...so, that means you haven't kissed him?"

Kjelle laughs more, the sound ringing out in the night. She wades closer to me. But not too much, just enough for me to want to close the gap. "Of course not Severa. And before you ask, yes I still have virgin lips, so don't bother me about it."

I cough to cover up the squeal ready to erupt from my throat. _Good. I want no one else to kiss you._ I play with a loose strand of hair that's escaped from my bun. "Do you...want to? L-like, at some point, I mean." I look at her to gauge her reaction.

Kjelle shrugs, her eyes unreadable. "I guess...just to get it over with and actually know what the hype is all about."

I step closer to her. There's now a few inches of space between us. I could almost feel her breath. _I want her to bite me again_. I put a hand on her bicep. Since she's totally ripped, I press a thumb to test her muscles...aaand yeah, no fat. It's like they were fucking sculpted from marble. "Kjelle…" I breathe.

"Yes?" She puts a hand on my cheek.

I swallow the stupid cheesy stuff that's on the tip of my tongue to say, "If you want to get it over with…"

My best friend smirks. "If you insist." And she leans in to kiss me.

* * *

I took Sumia to the riverbank to look at the ducks and swans. I'm plucking grass and half-heartedly throwing it into the water. Some of the aquatic birds are intrigued and swim close to me, quacking and swimming in lazy circles. Once we made it it here, I lost the drive to speak my mind, so Sumia's patiently waiting for me to say my piece. I've said some half-formed sentences, like, "I love Chrom. Or loved. I don't know," "I love you," and, "I'm tired." I've been saying the third thing most of all. Sumia has a hand on my shoulder, but not putting any weight behind it, as if she's scared that if she puts too much pressure, I'll scatter like the grass.

To distract me, Sumia asks, "What do you like about the river?"

I lift a shoulder. When I did rowing back in college, we practiced on the Hudson everyday at 6 a.m. It was a weird green color and pretty dirty, but the Newark Bay is cleaner. More blue. There are couples rowing in swan boats. I used to want Chrom to take me, then my ex-husband. But I think I wanted to take Sumia most of all. She's not a great swimmer, but she loves romantic spots like this. This is where Chrom took her for their one-year anniversary and their twentieth wedding anniversary. They still keep the spark alive by visiting national parks and going to places like Sydney, Australia and Santiago, Chile. Of course, sometimes it has to be a family vacation 'cause of the twins, but they still act like they're sixteen and starting out.

 _Shit Cordelia. Now you're getting bitter again._

"I want to take you boating," I mumble.

Sumia hums. "That sounds fun. Why don't we?"

"Because now I'm just thinking about Chrom and I don't want to do the thing you've already experienced."

Sumia sighs. She gets up and walks to the edge. The birds swim toward her in curiosity. She bends down, cups her hands in the water, and gets a small puddle going. She then gets back up, walks over to me, and throws the water at me. I yelp. "Sumia, what the fuck!?" My orange ruffled blouse is wet now.

She starts running. "Come and catch me!" she yells. I groan and give chase.

"Sumiaaa!" We run across a red wooden bridge, but just as we reach the other side, Sumia trips and falls. "Mia no!" I leap to envelop her in my arms right before we hit the ground and tumble. My shoulder takes the brunt of the force. We roll to a stop a few inches from the dirt path. Sumia's on top, her raspberry perfume directly hitting my nose. "Mia?" I question.

Her face is pressed against my neck. Her shoulders shake, immediately making me think that she's crying or in pain, but then I hear her peals of laughter. Sumia raises her head enough to look at me, gray eyes filled with mirth. "Let's do that again!"

I release her and poke her side. "You scared me Mia!" She rolls off of me.

Giggling, she swats my hand away. "Stooop, that hurts!"

"Oh yeah," I say while poking her more, "say that to my wrecked shoulder!"

Sumia suddenly loses all joy, her eyes wide and her mouth in a small O. "Wait, really, is it dislocated?" She moves to inspect it. It's bright red and I wince when she presses a thumb on it. I slowly roll my shoulder to test it out. It hurts to move, but it doesn't feel dislocated… "Ugh dammit…" Sumia curses under her breath. "And I was doing so well today…"

"Hey, it's not your fault…" I look at her mussed up hair. "Wait, where's your beret…?"

"Hm?" Sumia puts a hand on her head, as if confirming for herself that her beret is really gone. "Huh?" Both of us look around the vicinity, and I catch sight of it in the middle of the bridge. I make a move to get up and get it, but Sumia pulls me down. I give her a look and try to get up again, but she grabs my wrists and won't let me. I frown. "Come on, Delia, you're hurt…" I shake my head to tell her it's okay. But then she inches closer, her legs folded underneath her, and traces my palm lines. The intimate sensation rushes up my arms and I blush.

"But...your beret…" Yet Sumia pays no mind; her only focus is my hands. "Sumia…" I breathe. _I want her so bad._

Sumia looks up at me and gets really close to my face. I start panicking. _What is she doing?_ She bites her lip. _Was that on purpose? Is she trying to seduce me?_ "I want all of you," she whispers. I could've died right then and there and I would've been absolutely satisfied with my life from just that.

But she pulls away just as suddenly and looks down at my hands again, a tinge of pink spreading across her cheeks. She tucks her silver hair behind an ear and traces my palms again. I ignore my injured shoulder⸺I should really get an ice pack on that, honestly⸺to ask, "Why didn't you…?"

The shy, skittish, lovestruck Sumia from high school comes back. She covers her face with her hands, squealing and mumbling five thousand things at once. I raise an eyebrow and wait for her to stop. After a moment, she lets out a deep breath and moves her hands away. Her face is completely pink. She looks at me briefly to say, "It's up to you to kiss me or not this time," before averting her eyes and staring at the lone beret. A few leaves have dropped to keep it company.

I blink, my heart going off like a tea kettle. _Um._ I realize now that Sumia has initiated all the romantic intimacy between us. Of course, I loved it and wholeheartedly reciprocated, but…

 _What about Chrom?_

 _What_ about _Chrom?_

 _Can you do this and let go?_

 _Do you want to?_

...Yes. Yes, yes I do. Sumia, the girl who looked at me the second day of pre-K and loudly proclaimed, "That's my best friend!" Sumia, the woman who loves swings and loves it when I push her. Sumia, the girl who partook in pie-eating contests back in college. Sumia, the woman I swore to spend the rest of my life with. She's looking at me right now, hope in her beautiful eyes.

I reach out and cup her cheek with my hand. Her eyes widen and begin to water. I lean in for a slow kiss, relishing in her warm tongue, her soft lips. Sumia moans and she falls back so that I'm on top. It hurts to rest my elbow on the ground because of my shoulder, but I manage to press my body against her. Sumia runs her fingers through my red hair, giggling. I pull away for a moment and give her an eskimo kiss. A tear has escaped her, and my eyes are pretty watery too. I whisper, "I love you, Sumia."

Sumia gives the biggest smile. "I love you too, Cordelia."


	11. Possibilities of the Future

Kjelle and I haven't stopped kissing. She tastes like onion rings and lemonade. Her arm is around my waist and I wrapped a leg around hers. _I want to take everything off._ But I have to ask first.

"Mmm, hey Kjelle?" I pull away to ask. Her eyes flutter open, making my heart throb.

"What's up Severa?" She sounds infuriatingly calm, but the way she's giving me come-hither eyes gives her away.

"Umm...do you like...like me?"

Kjelle scoffs and rolls her eyes. "If I didn't, would we be so tangled up in each other like this? In a pool, no less?"

I giggle and bite my lip. "I guess not…"

She laughs. "Come on, let's continue this in bed." With that, she picks me up bridal style, to my surprise, and carries me out of the pool, my feet splashing all the way.

* * *

We're sitting in the backseat of my car, kissing, reminiscing about our lives together, our future dreams. Anything to delay giving Sumia back to Chrom and her kids. I just told her about the latest ceramic I've made, when she says, "I love how ninety percent of the dishware you and Severa use is made by you!"

I laugh and nod. I have my good arm around her shoulders. The other one has an ice pack on it. After we finished kissing back at the park, Sumia got up to get her beret and our stuff from the other bank and led me to find the park's first-aid clinic. Then we spent the rest of the day wandering around. And yes, we did do the swan boating. Just seeing her light up looking at them was enough motivation for me.

Eventually, I check the time. It's 9:17 p.m. Way past Sumia's curfew. The twins have been calling the past hour, asking for her help with astrology⸺they want to make a comprehensive natal chart. And Cynthia...well, she just loves cuddling with her mom. I sigh. "It's getting pretty late…" _And we've been parked here for the last forty-three minutes._

Sumia pouts. "Noo, five more minutes!" She nuzzles her face into my neck.

I kiss the top of her head. "You've been saying that for the last fifteen minutes."

She looks up at me, eyes dull and sad. "I know…but let's do this again soon, okay? I can't be without my other half for too long." She brightens up at the last part, looking like such an adorable puppy.

I kiss her sweetly. "Definitely." Sumia of course takes her time getting out of the car, picking up her purse as if it weighed fifty pounds, stretching her arms. When she finally gets out, she leaves the car door open and takes her time stretching her legs, warming up for greeting her family again. "Get inside safe," I call.

Sumia grins. "Don't drive off until you see me inside." Then she turns away and bounds up to her front door, the yard already decorated for 4th of July. She doesn't even have to take out her keys; Chrom opens the door and she jumps into his arms. The small seed of anger is ready to germinate, but I squash it down. _Enjoy it. They deserve it_. I smile at them and wave when Chrom sees me.

"Hey Cor!" he says once he lets go of Sumia, waving back. "Did you have fun?"

"Yo Chrom! Yeah, you bet. Take care of her."

He laughs his big laugh. "Always. Come inside sometime, alright? Don't be a stranger." I chuckle and accept his invitation. The married couple turns away from me to go inside, but I'm able to hear Chrom ask, "Why were you two outside for so long?" before the door shuts.

I sit in the backseat a while longer, checking my phone for any updates from Severa. She's stopped telling me where she was once she got to the mall with Kjelle. _I wonder what they're up to..._


End file.
